It was probably a long time coming, that emotional meltdown I had yesterday. Who's to say which straw put the crimp in the camel's back or which one broke it? The almost constant pain and fatigue? Our country's most recent act of terrorism? Or this 6
Jesse came in from work yesterday afternoon with that beautiful creature in tow. Actually, I'm not sure who was towing whom. The doggie is much stronger than he looks.
Jesse had gone by his dad's house to find that his stepmom had captured this boy. He had been roaming the neighborhood and Debbie was afraid he would get hit by a car on their busy street. Whatever caused Jesse to decide to bring him to our house I do not know. But the beautiful beast certainly contributed to the meltdown.
But let's go back to the beginning. I woke up yesterday morning feeling drained. My back was spasming big time, and all I could think of was how badly the back porch and all its furnishings were in need of washing to get rid of the pollen. Just the thought made the pain spread.
I diddled through the day as best I could. I didn't do any porch scrubbing, or much of anything else really. Straightened up the kitchen a bit, made the bed, and sewed a hanging sleeve on the "September" quilt. It was around 4:00, I think, before I became aware of the Boston Marathon bombing.
That, I suppose, was the straw. Because I started crying and couldn't stop. With each new image or report or the carnage, the tears increased. Finally, I got the sobbing under control just before Jesse showed up with the pooch, settled him into the backyard, and took off with his friend Devon for a four-wheeler ride.
One more life form to care for.
I won't go through all the details. Suffice to say that some of those details included me trying to get the doggie into my car to take him to Andy's house, and him pulling me all over the yard by his leash; Andy showing up after I got the dog back inside the fence; Andy putting doggie into her car; me making her take him back out and return him to the backyard (I think I was totally insane by this point); and Andy going home. All the time, off and on (mostly on), I'm sobbing. I haven't cried so much or so hard since September 2009.
Now I know, any sane person would have simply said, "No, Jesse. We can't have another animal. Take him back where you got him."
But at that point, you could hardly call me sane. I couldn't think what to do. All I could think of was Boston's dead and maimed and me living in an animal preserve. My brain wouldn't function.
Anyway, Jesse returned, calmly told me he was taking the dog back to his stepmom, put him in his truck, and drove away. That was that. He returned shortly thereafter with no dog. He said the dog was very happy to be back at Debbie's house. Today I'm going to make flyers and Jesse and Andy are going to put them up in the neighborhood where the doggie was found.
If anyone is up for adopting a beautiful husky, this one will be available if we don't find the owner within the next week or so.
Case closed--I hope.
I finally stopped crying at about midnight last night. I awoke this morning with a terrible headache (which is now gone) and allover body pain (which isn't). I'm very tired too. Maybe that was good for me though. Maybe all those tears got rid of some of the toxins, emotional if not physical. I can only hope.
God bless the people of Boston. Please, God, help our world purge itself of the hatred.
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On 04/16/2013, Donna said ...
Susan,
I just read your previous posts to catch up with what's been going on with you. Glad your knee is better! Hope the rest of your aches and pains get better also. I feel older than what I am every day :(
The Boston bombing is just awful and makes me so sad to watch it. What is the world coming to? The doggie is adorable and I am like you I don't need another animal around my house right now. I love them all but enough is enough :)
Hope the rest of your day is good!
Hugs,
Donna
On 04/16/2013, Barbara Anne said ...
Amen, sister!
As my Grandma used to say, "Keep tears inside and they turn to vinegar making you sour. Let the tears come."
Chronic pain and chronic illness are wearing on every part of you and on every nerve you have. You're not the first or the last to burst into tears when the straw that broke the camel's back lands. We can sit on that bench together!
I'm glad this lost and beautiful Huskie is no longer at your house and hope his/her owner sees the flyers.
The horrors caused by hate are such a heartbreak and in so many cases, the hate has been taught to the children. Why? What a tragedy for everyone.
Wishing you well and I mean really WELL.
Big but gentle hugs!
On 04/16/2013, Linda Volz said ...
Hi Susan -
Huskie's are gorgeous animals but one thing anyone who is thinking of getting one should know up front...they are runners and they love to wander. A 6 ft chain link fence is no obstacle for them, they will sail over it like it's not even there. They are beautiful but wanting to go exploring is just part of their nature. This beautiful "beastie" belongs to someone who is probably looking frantically for it and I know you will find the owner soon.
I'm sorry you are not feeling well, constant chronic pain is very wearing and your poor nerves are probably just raw which is why the events that took place in Boston have hit you so hard. You need some TLC, some rest and quiet, unplug the TV, computer, radio & any other device that will have any sad reports on it. These things are terrible but let someone else who is a little stronger right now grieve for them. Right now, you need to take care of you.
I wish I lived closer, I would come bring you some tea and cake to make you feel better.
Wishing you blessings,
Linda
On 04/16/2013, Ramey Channell said ...
There are signs posted in my neighborhood for a missing huskie with a picture of the missing dog. Might be him.
On 04/16/2013, Ramey Channell said ...
By the way: the huskie: don't let him get your goat!
On 04/16/2013, Sandy said ...
So sorry you've had such a hard time lately. I've always believed that a good purging does a body good every once in a while. Hopefully better days ahead. I've been meaning to tell you how much I like your new picture. Love the way your blouse matches your wallpaper!!!
On 04/16/2013, Jan said ...
I'm afraid Sophie would join Skipper in the escape to China digging if the huskie moved in! Those two would be outta' there! I'm so glad to hear Andy & Jesse have moved on to Plan B. Remember the song "It's My Party & I'll Cry If I Want To"? Do what you need to do to let it out!!! Take care of yourself!!
On 04/16/2013, Valerie said ...
Bless your heart! I think we all need those days sometimes! Praying for you.
On 04/16/2013, Dolores Tanner said ...
Amen, purge ourselves & others of this ongoing hatred... sometimes a good cry is helpful...hoed it is...
On 04/16/2013, Helen said ...
You are such a big hearted caretaker.....a generous heart that others count on.....even those with four legs and paws:))......but your own tank needs filling too I think...and sometimes we need to put self first....with no guilt or that feeling that we are letting others down. Lecture concluded:))).
The unexplainable evil and horror in Boston hits us as a nation...to cause such mayhem upon innocent souls celebrating with so many from around the world...just defies reason.
On 04/17/2013, Kai said ...
Sometimes a meltdown is the only way to go! It's exhausting, it's inconvenient, but it's like a good rain - clears the muck in the air! I love you, Susan, and hope you start feeling TONS better. It's HARD these obnoxious pains that we never invite but which visit us anyway. Treat your sweet lil' self well!!!
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