So I decided to mow the lawn late yesterday afternoon. I have never operated the riding mower, so I decided I'd stick with what I know to avoid frustration. But frustration would not be ignored.
I checked the gas tank on the little red mower, filled it from the big red gas can, and gave the starter cord a great big yank, expecting the best and getting the worst. It didn't start. So I pulled it again...and again...and again and againandagainandagain, etc., etc., etc., all the time terrified that some manly neighbor was watching me out his window and thinking the things that some men are prone to think about the combination of woman and machine.
But I persevered, and on the 257th yank, the engine started! It started and promptly stopped. Time for some manly cussing--which I did quite expertly (having learned from a great teacher, Vann). By now, my back problem had reared it's ugly head, and my arm was so tired I thought it might stage a rebellion. But no, the arm was up for a few more yanks.
After giving the back a few minutes to un-seize, I commenced to yank anew. And lo, when I was just about to give up and count all a loss, the engine started--and remained running. Oh joy, oh golden joy!
My celebration was not yet complete, when who should drive up but my daughter Andy. I was busted. She got out of her car, pitched a fit, and (still dressed in her scrubs and white shoes from work) took the mower away from me and began to mow. Oh defeat! Oh grey-green obnoxious defeat!
Andy had not mowed many rows, back and forth, until she stopped to take off her jacket. I grabbed the mower and off I went, smelling the sweet scent of victory as well as the nostalgic aroma of cut grass. Andy took the opportunity to go into the house to get a drink or something and before she returned, up walks Brad, A Neighbor. I saw him coming and thought, "Oh #%@*! Busted again."
"Please let me do that for you," said my sweet neighbor. I wanted to tell him how hard I had worked to get the dad-blamed mower started, how I had been caught by my daughter and chastised, how I now had gained access to my mower again and wanted to continue on my self-sufficient task of lawn upkeep. But by then I was totally exhausted (don't tell Andy). So all I said was, "Are you sure?" to which Brad answered, "Yes. I want to do this for you." So I gave up.
Andy came out of the house and pitched another fit. "He's going to think I'm a terrible daughter, letting you mow the grass" she moaned.
"Oh hush!" I wanted to say. "Just bow to defeat as I have."
We sat in lawn chairs, Andy and I, and enjoyed the rain of pollen while Brad did a beautiful job on the lawn and Sophie barked her head off at a squirrel up a tree in the yard next door.
I love my neighbors, and my neighborhood. I'm going to bake Brad a rum cake as a token of my appreciation for his kindness. After all, I don't think manly people have any problem with the combination of woman and oven. And, by my calculation, this lawn is going to need mowing at least 30 more times before we get a frost next October.
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On 04/10/2010, Mandy said ...
I jealous that your grass has grown enough to be mowed! We've got 6+ inches of snow so far today and 6+ more to come!
On 04/10/2010, Fitzy said ...
We lived about a half a mile from church on a state road. Every week, my mother and I would TRY to walk to church. EVERY WEEK, a good intentioned church member would stop to pick-up the poor unfortunates. How can you tell them, "Please, NO! We're enjoying the walk on a sunny morn?"
On 04/10/2010, ashleigh said ...
I hope you enjoyed your attempt to mow your own grass cause you good an well that the men that live around you will not let that happen again. :D We were all told to look out and care for you if ever needed and lawn care was one of those things discussed. They will all take turns mowing the grass and Paul will tell them all what they are doing wrong and try and fix it. But never the less you are never alone and never without a more able bodied person to lend a hand. We a love you and even being 8 hours away I know that I even have a family of friends there willing to help when ever in need. Just give in now while it is still easy to do. :0) love you ash
On 04/10/2010, Barbara Anne said ...
We've got calf-high weeds! Need any clover?
In your neighborhood, if anyone saw you trying to start your stubborn lawn mower, they'd have been there to help in a heartbeat. Brad was the first to see you and he came right over. I'd let him use the riding mower on your yard and his yard in exchange for a baked goodie with each mowing. As an alternate idea and so Brad won't gain too much weight, you could pay for the gas for his yard if he uses your riding mower. Discuss among yourselves!
I understand your wish to be independent, but remember how good it makes people feel to help out. You did the right thing. Please tell Andy it's okay and she needs not fret!
Please take muscle relaxers or aspirin as needed since your body may have ugly things to say to you about all of those cord pulls.
Hugs!
On 04/10/2010, Allyson in Alaska said ...
Although this might not have been your ultimate goal, this was a hilarious story to read on a Saturday morning. Beautifully written. You are so smart and sassy!
Enjoy all the guardian angels raining upon you. It's a true sign that so many people love and care. And really, would we have it any other way?
On 04/10/2010, Helen in Switzerland said ...
Someone once told me - and I really think it's true - that if someone offers to help then generally it's because they want to and that you really should let them as good deeds make the doers feel good too. It's a true win-win situation. So no guilt, you did your neighbour a favour by saying yes! Enjoy your garden and your daughter and your nice weather and have a good weekend Susan!
On 04/10/2010, Toni said ...
Thank you for sharing Sue...lol...that so made my morning! Garden machines, tools & I don't work well together, but I'm trying!
On 04/10/2010, KAI said ...
Three resounding cheers to YOU for getting that naughty machine going without beating it to death (I would have, I'm afraid) to Andy for being a darling of a daughter, and to Brad for proving that chivalry IS still alive & well! To your reader, Mandy - I am jealous of YOUR snow! I want it! I NEED it! Sigh ...!
On 04/10/2010, Sandi said ...
My arm got tired as I read your account....Good for you that you got the mower going! And the end result of sitting on the porch while the manly neighbor mowed was a great reward. :-) That is some might lovely grass you have there!
On 04/10/2010, Pokey said ...
Boy, I've been there with the cantankerous mower! We have a good one now, but I remember pulling on the cord, counting each pull, and saying, okay, if I have to pull to 100, I'm resting before I mow!
Now, to go to the hardware store and say, I want a weed whacker I can run, not anyone else. If I can start it, then it will be the one!
On 04/10/2010, Loribelle said ...
I have a great little red mower! (thanks to you and Uncle Vann) Didn't get any sewing done this evening...after sitting down at your house...then sitting down with Wes & Jean...and sitting down to dinner with my hubby...there was no getting up for me. My next trip is all the way from my couch to the bed. G'nite my wonderful, witty friend (I read this to Greg - I'll tell you his two cents later ;-) love you, LBJ
On 04/11/2010, kayellen said ...
You have a determined desire to~~~ "just do it!" No exceptions:)
Sorry you had a stubborn mower...
A continued inspiration!
xoxo
Kay
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