I keep thinking that when I get my house and yard just like a want it, I'll go to bed and stay for a week. That thought, your encouragement, and God's help are all that are getting me through these days. The pain is really bad. And the stiffness and fatigue. My arms and legs feel like they're attached to my body with rusted bolts.
In addition, I seem to be dwelling excessively on all the hate in the world. It seems now that we in the U.S. are supposed to hate everyone if we're good Christians and patriotic Americans. We hate the Muslins, the Latinos, the Liberals or the Conservatives or both, the gay people, the Chinese, the Russians, the Africans, the Koreans, the Buddhists, and now even the Europeans.
I'm so weary with the hate. I can't even watch the news anymore because that's all it's about. Turn on Fox News and you get the hate firsthand; turn on CNN and you have to listen to reports about the hate. You have to really search for the real news and cull it out of all the nyeh nyeh nyeh.
How has this country become a nation of haters? Has it always been this way? Have I had my head up my ---, as one young conservative told me? Is it this way all over the world? Didn't we learn anything that Jesus tried to teach us? Was his sacrifice for nothing?
And there's this; Is it hate, or is it actually fear? And if it's fear, what are we afraid of?
In addition, I just read yet another report on a study that proved yet again that fibromyalgia is real. It also said that the disability effects are comparable to those of rheumatoid arthritis, congestive heart failure, diabetes, recent heart attack, and even cancer. Knowing that, doesn't it seem that the medical scientists could at least find an effective treatment if not a cure?
And then there's that asteroid that's supposed to hit the earth. When do you suppose that's coming?
Whine whine whine whine whine. Moan, gripe, complain. I'm probably bringing everyone down with this depressing post. Should I just delete it and not post today? Probably. But I'm not going to. I need encouragement.
This post was migrated from the old blog. To see the comments on the original post, CLICK HERE. To add a new comment, click "Post a Comment", below.
On 05/27/2010, Lavender Dreamer said ...
I wish I could give you a hug this morning. I could use one, too. Life can be so hard and there are so many things to worry about if we dwell on things. I am sorry you are in pain and will say an extra prayer for you. HUGS coming your way today! I care! ♥
On 05/27/2010, Linda said ...
Just remember - it's always darkest before the dawn.
I have recently had a bout with osteoarthritis in my hand and didn't realize how it was dragging me down until it started to feel better. Wow! What a difference.
I pray you will get some relief and I believe you will feel better mentally as well.
Like you I have had to stop watching the news. It seems like everybody expects you to take one side or the other. Shouldn't be sides. We are all Americans and should stick together more.
And I do think there is a lot of fear out there. People always fear what is unfamiliar to them.
On 05/27/2010, Sandy said ...
Sometimes like the rest of us you just have to vent....you need a hug but I know that can be painful also.
Poor Sophie, I bet she got scolded alot. and I know your anxiety was real - I thought I lost my husbands jack russell and I paniced !!!
Don't be hard on yourself- you've already gotten a lot accomplished since you started your house transformation.
Hope you and Sophie have a peaceful and restful day..
On 05/27/2010, Helen in Switzerland said ...
Hi Susan,
I'm sorry that you are having to carry a heavy burden at the moment. I think when you have a medical condition that you know probably isn't going to get better there are bound to be days when it is just all too much. I seem to have a lot of friends going through trying times at the moment - and sometimes there isn't a whole lot that I can do to help, except be there for them. I hope you can find something today that you can do for yourself that will make you happy - even if it's only for a short time. I know that we are taught that God doesn't load us with burdens that are too heavy for us, but sometimes I wonder. And you're right - the world often isn't a nice place. I've really appreciated the recent political changes in England, where for the first time politicians are having to work together instead of against each other - finally, although the country is in a big mess, there seems to be more of a spirit of co-operation.
I read a nice - and positive - current affairs website that you might like - www.tonic.com - a good friend of mine writes for it.
I can also recommend (highly) a good book with your feet up, a gin and tonic and a bar of very nice chocolate. That always helps me a little when I'm down.
You're in my prayers Susan - with a big hug from cyberspace...
Helen
On 05/27/2010, Ruth said ...
I tend not to watch. listen or read the news anymore, it makes me too depressed and angry. I suppose its copping out but I am happier if I concentrate my energies on my family, garden , quilting, knitting etc.
I'm sure that stress must be a contributing factor with your fibriomyalgia Susan, so you better stop getting upset about the politicians etc.
As a Canadian I dont see the Americans as being hated, wherever we live we are all people who just want to live our lives. The extremists spoil things for us all.
Hugs and a special prayer for us all today as we're all on this Earth together.
Ruth
On 05/27/2010, Jan said ...
Oh honey, I wish I could come kidnap you and wisk us both off to some wonderful little town in New England ... a place where it's cool and the folks are all sooooooooo welcoming, so we could just forget all the worries of this world! I know it's probably not the best remedy, but I steer totally away from all the news! I find it all sooooo depressing, so I just don't watch it. I can't even remember the last time I tuned in. Every now and then I happen across something on line and I swear it ruins my entire day, so I totally understand why it's got you down; and I'm so very sorry for all your aches and pains. It sounds like a horrid disease and I truly understand how hard it is to live with a chronic disability. Our Daughter endured for 23 long years and now my Hubby is living it w/his back that the Doctors say looks like a train wreck. Prayers will be going up for you my dear and I hope that you'll just sit back, forget everything and get some rest! Perhaps some hand work is in order :) God Bless!
On 05/27/2010, Michelle said ...
I am sorry that you are feeling so down today. Everyone has these types of days. I just try to look at life as being half full in the glass. I learned this saying from an elementary teacher when I was in 5th grade: This to shall pass. I try to remember that when I am feeling down. Take a break and rest today, watch a good funny movie and relax. All the work will be there tomorrow but you will feel better tomorrow and be able to tackle it better. Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs to you!
On 05/27/2010, Sharon said ...
I very seldom watch the news - I do believe there are also a ton of good things happening in the world, but they are just not so newsworthy, so we never hear about them. I also just skim through the newspapers.
I tend to see the glass half-full, and I also believe I need to focus on just what I can have any control over, and let go of the rest. (The Serenity Prayer) My attempts at control - over my little world right now - include, as you are doing, fixing up my little nest of a home with remodeling, repairing, etc., and - - my quilting. At least I feel I have some control over my quilting.
May tomorrow be a better day for you!
On 05/27/2010, Barbara Anne said ...
Huge hugs! I'm one who never ever watches FOX or CNN for that very reason. I watch BBC news as it's far less awful. The news may be bad, but hate isn't mixed in.
"God is love"
"God don't make junk."
The evil spewing of hate is just that - evil. I believe that we are called to love, to see all as God's children, to see all creation as God's love in tangible form. Celebrate diversity as God clearly did in creating so many different kinds of plants, animals, elements, bugs, rocks, clouds, and every other thing you can think of. One "right" kind? Nope! Not mere tolerance of differences that can too easily become intolerance, but a real appreciation of our difference. Okay, off that soapbox!
Your blog and many others are celebrating the dailiness of life that we have in common around the globe. You and others add beauty and friendship-forming conversations in the lives of the readers and each blog is a blow for GOOD, and a little 1st Amendment horn.
Be of good cheer!
Hugs!
On 05/27/2010, Kelly Ann said ...
Okay Missy....here is what you do...turn off the TV, unless you're watching HGTV or FoodTV...or better yet, grab that Kendell and head outside, in the shade, take something cold to drink, grab the Sophie Girl ( on a leash) and relax. Don't let the negative energies get into your head...focus on your health and positive energy will flow around you...
On 05/27/2010, k&c's mom said ...
The comments encouraged me! You have quite a lot of very positive people around you, so I know that you are really a positive person under a bit of a cloud right now. Rest, take your time, ask for help, do what you need to do to make the "fixing" up a joy in itself. And please keep posting!
On 05/27/2010, Joanne, Armstrong, BC, Canada said ...
Sorry that things hurt so much today. I have some sense of what that is like. But in good news - last fall I took a chronic pain self-management program (developed at Standford U)that - among other things - helped me understand the interrelationships between pain, stress, sleep troubles, negative emotions, and so on. Learning to lessen one of these broke the cyclical results and helped all the others. It's very encouraging. Email me if you'd like to hear more.
On 05/27/2010, Pat Nordahl said ...
Susan
I have been reading and enjoying your blog for quite some time now.Yes Fibro is real. I live with it too. There is not much to say that the others haven't already said. I think of you often and do marvel at all you seem to be etting done in the righting of your own world. Stress is a factor in your pain and of course grief also contributes.I think the suggestion of a cold drink, a good book and a shady spot with Sophie is the best for the moment. Take care and know that we care.
Patty
On 05/27/2010, Gayle said ...
I hear you loud and clear. :-)
Eighteen years ago, our pediatrician told us to only get our news from newspapers because she believed that background TV News noise was detrimental to the well-being of children. It was amazing advice. You can take the newspaper in doses and it doesn't invade so many senses. You also tend to not read articles over and over again, but TV News will pound the same message/images across the airwaves over and over again. So I hear you re: the news...and it has changed over the years...I miss Walter Cronkite. :-)
On 05/27/2010, Ramey said ...
Have you tried the honey & cinnamon tea every morning, or honey and cinnamon on (unbleached) toast? Mable and I were just discussing this yesterday. I think it's 1 taablespoon honey and 1/4 teaspoon cinnamon, in a cup of hot water or on toast every morning. It's good for everything, esp. heart conditions, allergies, arthritis, diabetes, the list is long. And it just makes you feel better, like a rejuvenated person.
As far as the hate business, it has been a constant force in my world since the '60s when all the good Christian adults hated any young person with long hair or a smile on their face, or a black face. But we have to remember "Be the change you want to see in the world," and that may be about all we can do.
On 05/27/2010, KAI said ...
As a fellow sufferer of Fibro (as well as Lupus) I can truly sympathize & relate! It's miserable, I know, but thankfully the symptoms come & go. (Don't we wish they'd just GO!!!) As for news, I watch the WEATHER segment of the local news. Period. I keep up with relevant things via the internet but, like you, I don't like buying into all the doomsday attitude and the rah-rah America; bah humbug everyone else. I'm as patriotic as anyone, but I believe loving our own country does NOT equate with HATING everyone else's! Hatred gets us nowhere good. I choose to LOVE. I know YOU do, too! So don't you worry about the naysayers and the rest. Finally, WE all LOVE you, Susan! And, far as I'm concerned, you can blog your feelings anytime because that's what friends are for! I LOVE YOU!
On 05/27/2010, CarlaH said ...
Susan, like you we find the news so depressing and to make it worse it is repeated ad nauseam -sometimes I think that news (bad that is) has become entertainment. As for atmosphere of hate I equate it with fear and ignorance - it seems so much easier to hate someone (thing) than to try to understand them (it).
Follow all those suggestions regarding getting more rest - remember that old adage "Rome wasn't built in a day" and give yourself some leeway regarding the GYHEM - it will get done.
On 05/27/2010, Brenda Kula said ...
I avoid Fox News like the plague. If I go into a doctor's office and it's on, I ask them to change it. I have never heard such cruel hate as I've heard there. I think people are scared. And when they're scared, they go to extremes. It's terribly sad. Blog Land is a good place to come. Because we love you.
Brenda
On 05/27/2010, Debra said ...
You need to rest. The house can wait but your body can't so listen to your body with both ears and don't be so stubborn! (said in the kindest way, really!)
On 05/27/2010, Pat said ...
I, too, ignore most of the news. Everyone is right. How can that be? I thought only One Person was perfect and now He is interceding for us! I'm sorry you're not feeling well. Rest. Read a good book. Pretend it's 25 degrees outside and just stay put in your cozy house as if you were snowed in for a day or two. I'm trying to catch up after being out of town yet again, and I can hear my self saying, "Rest!" God bless you - please take care...
On 05/27/2010, Mariel said ...
I don't know if you have ever considered taking a holistic approach to treating your fibromyalgia as apposed to traditional medicine. There is a website...drwhitaker.com that may have info to consider.
I have diabetes and am considering a different approach since the drugs they prescribe are so strong and have many side effects. (namely kidney and liver damage) I have also noticed Dr Whitaker's ads on some of the other blogs I read. He is pretty well known. Just a thought.
I know it's hard in today's world to keep a positive attitude but it's the best thing we can do for our own sake. Best of luck to you. Tomorrow's a new day!
On 05/27/2010, Joyce said ...
Susan, you know that you & I are at opposite ends of the political spectrum, but that doesn't mean we must hate each other or anyone with opposing views, for that matter. Scripture says we are to love each other... even our enemies (you are not my enemy, btw.). And we are to pray for them. My suggestion: TURN OFF THE TV!!!! Put on some praise music and permeate your environment with it. The enemy (satan) is trying to steal your joy. You have the most effective weapon of all ... The Word. Read Ephesians. You already know it but we all need reminding from time to time when things overwhelm us. Don't give up. Spend your day in His Word, praise Him and refuse to give your thoughts over to the enemy's sly tactics. He knows where you are weak and will attack you there. But remember the source of your strength. I will repeat... quit listening to the news, quit talking about politics, quit anything that takes your focus off of Him. He will restore you. Love you, girl!
On 05/27/2010, Mary said ...
Firstly, thank you for wonderful blog which I seldom comment on. As to the hate, I saw a bumper sticker a couple of years ago, which I say as a prayer every morning and night. "God bless everybody in the world, NO EXCEPTIONS." I feel better and treat others better, I hope, as a result.
As to the news, remember when we trusted Walter Cronkite or David Brinkley to give it to us straight. But that was in a less than 30 minutes a day. That is all we should watch news, no matter the source. 30 minutes, after that it is no longer news it is pushing advertising, and no good to anyone. But don't give up, God only gives us as much as he thinks we can cope with, and he must think highly of you. Blessings.
On 05/28/2010, niki said ...
Oh, Susan, I can sympathize with you. I recently lost my husband and also have been redecorating. I faithfully read your blog for inspiration, but I do wonder if you may be taking on too much. Just love yourself as much as we readers do.
The world has definitely started to spin itself out of control. I only watch the news every other day and subscribe to the expression "Ignorance Is Bliss".
Just keep gardening (you have a terrific sense of color and texture), add a sink (why not?) Be daring and oh so clever. You have great taste, so just follow your heart.
On 05/28/2010, Joan said ...
Susan you need to take more time over the decorating. I have been following all the work you have been doing and just have been amazed at your motivation and drive. I just wish I had half of your 'energy'. My goodness it is time to pamper yourself and also review just how much you have done over the past few months .Take care .
On 05/30/2010, Speaking for the kids said ...
Sorry you are discouraged but things will get easier and if not God will give you the strength to get through.
I noticed several comments blaming the Fox network for things. I think they are allowed to present their opionions also. Too much is lost when the majority goes with the popular choices without thinking through the consequences of making choices. God says we are to love the sinner but hate the sin and I applaud people who are not afraid do that. Our morals, role models and the entertainment community have all taken a big downslide and too many people believe in doing whatever makes them feel good and don't worry about the consequences or example our young see.
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