I'm not sure why, but this time of year I always think of Rally 'Round the Flag, Boys, a wonderful book by Max Schulman and a fun movie (1958) starring Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward. It has been decades since I read the book or saw the movie. But I think it takes place during high summer in a small New England town, and I think there's a 4th of July picnic.
It is also near this patriotic holiday that I'm reminded how blessed I am to live in a small town, particularly a small southern town. Again, I'm not sure why. I guess summertime and small town life just sort of go together.
I have lived here almost all my life. The few times I have ventured away have not been pleasant times, and I always returned. I spent my childhood here, went to school here, raised my children here, and, as John Mellencamp says, "It's probably where they'll bury me." I feel sorry for people who live in big impersonal cities where things like these don't happen:
This morning, my postman rang my doorbell and handed me my mail, even though I have a mailbox at the curb. "I just wanted to tell you how much I miss my buddy (i.e. Vann)," said Shane. "He was one of the best. And I mean that." By then, my tears were threatening, so he added, "You just hang in there."
It was like someone knew I needed that boost right then. Because when the doorbell rang, I was remembering that today, 10 months ago, my Vann left this earth. It was like finding that grass-clipping heart yesterday. I believe in signs and messages from beyond.
The first time I visited my family doctor after Vann's passing, he gave me a hug and a smile before saying a word. Dr. M. is a real small-town doctor. He doesn't make house calls, but he works in a one-doctor office, "from can till can't," as they say, till everyone who needs him that day has been seen.
I received a sympathy card from my dentist (not dentist's office--dentist) shortly after Vann died. Then the first time I visited with him afterwards, I got that hug and smile from him. He's one of us, a Leedite, as Vann used to call us.
I attend church with people I've known all my life. Some of them taught me in elementary and high school. Some of them I taught in junior high. I've taught Sunday school and Bible school there. My children grew up in that church in in the same schools I attended.
I've been personally acquainted with every mayor we've had during my lifetime, actually related to one of them.
The hometown newspaper editor is a fellow church member of mine and a FaceBook friend.
My hometown is full of my relatives and friends I've had all my life. Both my sisters, one of my children, my grandson, and both my nieces live here--as well as aunts, uncles, and scores of cousins.
And even though the town has grown over the years and I no longer know everyone who lives here, I do remember a time when I knew almost everyone. And if I didn't know them, my mama or daddy did.
Leeds adopted Vann when we were married and he moved here with me. Before long, he actually knew more Leedites than I did, and everyone knew him. Vann was a small town southern boy himself, growing up in Camilla, Georgia. He moved to Birmingham in the 70s, but was thrilled to return to small-town life when we married.
There's more, much more. I'm sure that those of you who grew up in or have ever lived in a small town know what I'm talking about. Of course, there are a few negatives too. Folks in small towns often feel so close to you that they think it's okay to get all up in your private business. And because everyone knows everyone, gossip is a lot easier to come by. But the positives win out--oh the positives win by a landslide.
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On 07/02/2010, Lainee said ...
I saw the picture of your red and white dishware and shelf over on Sister's Choice blog...very nice...you're now an decorating example in blogland...congrats!!
On 07/02/2010, KAI said ...
That was absolutely my FAVORITE of your posts! I've always lived in big ol' Houston, but whenever I am lucky enough to visit the rez in Oklahoma, I am immediately transported to the Indian version of Mayberry. LOL! I LOVE knowing I can go up the steps to any house ON the rez & walk right on in the back door because I am FAMILY there! EVERYONE is. On any given morning you can see women outside talking and shelling peas, sometimes breaking into traditional songs. ALWAYS laughing. As a child I went yearly to my 'father's' hometown of Andalusia, Alabama. I loathed his relatives (sorry - but they were ALMOST as sick and horrid as HE was) but I LOVED the neighbors. Everyone waved and hollered hi, and it was awesome to walk barefooted in that red dirt, & see all the friendly smiles. I am a big city dweller, but my heart is in EVERY SMALLTOWN, USA!
On 07/02/2010, Helen in Switzerland said ...
Oh what a lovely post Susan. You are so lucky to have such a wonderful set up with family and friends around you. I envy you! I have just the opposite - my mother still lives in Newcastle in England where I grew up, but my school friends have mostly moved away. My brother and sister in law live on Vancouver Island and we get to see them once in a blue moon. That's it for my entire family! My husband's family lived not too far away from us, but one by one we have buried them all. His brother, now no longer with us never married and our three children have no cousins and only one uncle (in Canada). However we are blessed to have good friends, many of whom have been adopted as honorary aunts and uncles!
Family is the one thing you can't choose - but had I had the choice I think I would have loved to have had a big one!
I'll be thinking of you on the 4th July - although why you Americans ever wanted independence from the English I do not know. You could have had a Queen....!
On 07/02/2010, Mona said ...
Hi..
I used to live in a small town..chose it to raise my children in, but because it is in Southern California..it is NO longer small. The sheep farm has vanished...and a mall is there. The orange groves have been destroyed and three are now housing tract's there.
Seems all small towns change now. Sad, isn't it?
Thank you SO much for stopping by and commenting on my tablescape!
You were so kind! It really was not all that great...but thank you so much!
Hugs,
Mona
On 07/02/2010, MarieSews said ...
Oh you make me homesick! I grew up in a small Southern town....southern California! It was the same as you describe. You had to be careful what you did when out and about 'cause likely someone who knew your parents saw you and would let your parents know you had been acting up! Thanks for the memories!
On 07/02/2010, Stitchesandhooves.blogspot.com said ...
Well that was just the most touching post..thank you so much.
I have been following your blog for sometime and feel for the loss and changes in your life. I also live in a small town and have the same feelings you do. I am in Ontario, Canada..and there is not much difference to our lives in a small town. I would never survive in a city atmosphere..it would sufficate me.
Love the new furniture. I am a red fan also..(love my fire engine red washer/dryer..lol)
Enjoy the July 4th Celebratons.
Judi B.
Ontario
On 07/02/2010, Ramey said ...
Koda-chro-oh-ome!
They give us those nice bright colors,
Give us the gree-ee-eens of summer.
Makes you think all the world's a summy day
Oh yea!
On 07/02/2010, Ramey said ...
Oh dear! I did a Suzie! That's supposed to be SUNNY day!
On 07/02/2010, Deb said ...
Hi Susan ~ Happy 4th of July weekend! I loved your hometown post, too. I always loved going back to my hometown...yes, everybody knew just about everybody. I could never ever go to Walmart and come home quickly. Invariably I'd run into someone who was surprised to see me and just wanted to catch-up. It was fun. I don't go back there anymore these days; since my mom has moved in with us, there's just no reason to. Thanks for writing a post a lot of us can identify with!
On 07/02/2010, Nancy said ...
I grew up in the South - South side of Chicago (Roseland) that is. But I love the country - would rather be walking under and among tall trees than to walk barefoot in the sand on the beach. So I am hoping if the housing market is good to me that I can move from Florida to NW Indiana to a small town of about 850 to be nearer children and grandchildren. It will be 8 months on the 12th that my Hank will be gone. I so enjoy reading your blog for as I see your progress in doing things I know that I will get there to. Enjoy the 4th, I am going to see fireworks with my daughter that lives near me here in Hot Hot Florida. Nancy
On 07/02/2010, Barbara Anne said ...
What an charming, warm, and enviable picture you paint of your hometown. Color me green!
My longtime connections were by mail, phone, and are now by email. Now that we're in VA, like Helen, my family members are disappearing.
I'm glad you're there, surrounded by folks who love you and who loved Vann.
Hugs!
On 07/02/2010, Donna said ...
Susan,
I think of you everytime I pass through Leeds on my way to see my daughter Jennifer. I take the back roads as we say here in the South! It is a lovely small town. I have lived in the same small town all my life too where everyone knows each other.
I know you miss Vann. I can't believe it will be one year this month that my Amber went to Heaven ... how time passes.
Hugs,
Donna
On 07/02/2010, Sherri said ...
I dont know why but God put you on my mind today and my prayer for you is Gods Joy in your life. And reading your post just now I believe He has answered that prayer. Oh happy day...
On 07/03/2010, Pat said ...
I love my town I live in, but I LOVE my little "hometown" I try to visit often. All my "roots" are there and they're trying their best to go back to that native soil!
On 07/03/2010, AnnieO said ...
I live in the city where I was born, and am proud to be a hometown girl. But it is not a little city, we are about 100,000 people now, up from 22,000 when I was born. Sometimes when I go places I bump into 3-4 people I know. Other times I wonder, "where do all these people come from?" But we are not a big impersonal city. Hemmed in by the ocean, the hills, and two riverbeds, we are contained. I hope my children settle here too, and raise their children between the hills and the sea.
On 07/03/2010, Ruth said ...
Love your town, Susan. I could move there but I don't think I could take the humidity.
Ruth
On 07/14/2010, Patricia said ...
Susan,
Love your Rednesday. My most favorite color. Have been following your blog, really enjoy it and am so happy you keep it updated.
My question...where did you find the dishes with the flags in the center. I have a linen tablecloth that was Mother's with those same flowers and would love to find the dishes. Thank you.
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