I have been sitting here at the computer for a while now, and can't come up with anything interesting to write about--which should mean that I'll skip blogging today. But if I skip blogging, that means I have to get up right now and start doing something else--and I'm not ready to get up. So I'll share a treasure I found while organizing the storage room (which task is still not finished).
There were still several boxes of Vann's stuff, mostly work related, in there, and I've been going through it. I found this beautiful gold signet ring.
You might not be able to make out Vann's initials, DVC, engraved on this ring, but they're there. I don't think I ever saw this before. I can't remember it.
Sometimes it feels strange to remember that we each had lives completely apart from each other before we made a life together. In many ways, we felt like we'd always been together.
Vann and I met in late 1979 when I started working for Progressive Farmer magazine as an editorial assistant. Vann was working there as a photographer and later photo editor. A few years later when I became first a writer and then an editor, we had the chance to work together from time to time and became good friends. Later when both our marriages fell apart, our friendship was a sturdy stepping stone to our love for each other.
It was a long journey from our meeting in 1979 until our marriage in 1994. In fact, we were good friends almost as long as we were married. I think that's maybe a big reason why our marriage was a success. We liked each other enough to become good friends before we fell in love. We had a strong foundation to build on. So, as a married couple, whenever we had disagreements or arguments, we had that firm foundation to keep us grounded till we could get our emotions back in order.
It's fun to remember those early days of our friendship when just working together was fun and interesting. In fact, all the guys at PF were so good to work with. I was the only female farm editor for a long time there. The guys were so good to me that I felt like I had a great big family of brothers.
I don't really remember just when Vann and I fell in love. When it became evident that both our marriages were doomed, I think we relied on each other as sounding boards maybe more than other family and friends. Since our situations were very similar, we understood what each other was going through.
There are all kinds of ways to fall in love, and I don't discount for a minute love at first sight. That can work too. But I believe that our foundation of friendship and respect made it possible for us to weather the bad times and value the good times, knowing that we were together for the duration.The duration turned out to be much shorter than either of us wanted. But we packed those 15 years with enough love, fun, and friendship to have filled a lifetime.
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On 05/18/2011, Ellen said ...
What a wonderful love story. I can't help but think that finding little memories of Vann is his way of keeping in touch with you.
On 05/18/2011, Jan said ...
Tears falling, Susan. Tears falling. The ring story is beautiful.
On 05/18/2011, Debra said ...
I have to agree with Ellen.
On 05/18/2011, Sandy said ...
Your finding that ring is what is called a "God Wink" meant just for you. How special to think that God, creator of everything, winked at you. If we only knew......
On 05/18/2011, Barbara Anne said ...
What a sweet and charming love story, my dear friend! I hope Vann's signet ring will be something that brings warm and happy memories each time you see it or you wear it. What a treasure it is for you!
Big hugs!
On 05/18/2011, Helen in Switzerland said ...
What a lovely story. I'm so glad that you had such happiness together, but sad that it wasn't to be for longer. How wonderful though that you truly found your soulmate. Lots of people never do.
On 05/18/2011, LaVoice said ...
A strong foundation is what helps to keep love burning. Sounds as you two had that. Thanks for taking the time to share such a sweet part of your very personal life.
On 05/18/2011, alexandrine said ...
A magnifical story Susan.
Hugs.
On 05/18/2011, Ruth said ...
Thanks for sharing yout beautiful story. What a wonderful find the ring is, another reminder of your dear Vann.
Hugs Ruth
On 05/18/2011, Treadlemusic.wordpress.com said ...
I couldn't agree more with your beautiful sharing! Marriage must have a commitment to that which is "larger" than the individuals (that "larger" thing is the marriage itself) so when difficulties/challenges come that determination to commit overrides anything else and the work to repair the differences becomes the priority.DH and I have been married 43 years and have both entered the 'retirement' chapter of our lives.....as friends!
On 05/18/2011, Nicole said ...
Thank you for sharing your beautiful and precious memories Susan.
On 05/18/2011, Betty Lou said ...
Beautiful post. If I were you I would keep that ring close to me always and remember the life you had together.
On 05/19/2011, Beverly said ...
I believe finding that ring was another gift for you from your Vann. True love is a gift that lives forever.
Thank you for sharing this, Susan.
On 05/19/2011, Lisa said ...
Beautiful post of your beautiful memories. You have a wonderful way of looking at 'life'. Thank you for sharing some of your introspections with us.
On 05/19/2011, Diane W said ...
What can one say......Beautiful story, wonderful memories, and a little surprise every now and then. What a love the two of you shared.
On 05/20/2011, Sherry said ...
What a beautiful story. Thank you for reminding me of the blessing of sharing life with my best friend. We met and began dating in 1979 also, then married in '81.
God bless you,
Sherry @ A Happy Valentine
On 05/20/2011, Mary said ...
Thank you for sharing your beautiful thoughts and memories with all of us. I was flooded with the full spectrum of emotions as I read word after word. I always enjoy your blog and seem to relate to many of the medical and life partner topics. God Bless.
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